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Monday, June 13, 2011

Derailed, Depressed, Determination

It has been awhile since my last post. I was in a groove, things were going great, and my game plan was right on track. The Elephant Rock ride was a huge success! CrossFit was going great, I was prepping to set max's on all my lifts. I was researching CrossFit Endurance and looking to pull it into my training. My diet was dialed in, I had started a 30 day primal eating challenge. I stepped on the scale at 230 pounds, a total of 76 pounds lost. My goals and dreams were coming into focus and I was adding things to my bucket list of things I wanted to do. My fitness goals, my family happiness, and my work life balance were all within my grasp!
Then it happened, the slap in the face, the reality check, the kick in the balls. I was having an awesome Friday! My morning workout went really well, a group of us rode to the park, we let the kids play, and then we hit the field. We had bear crawl races, low crawl races, and wind sprints. We had kids from 5 years to 36 years having a blast, then it happened. I went to push off on a race with my right leg, it felt like I hit something with the back of my leg, I heard/felt a pop, I looked back, and then the pain hit me. My calf was shot. In an instant my great day and my good roll changed. I found myself sitting in my chair with the port-o-cool pumping ice water on my calf. I could walk without pain. I went to the doctor to rule out an achilles rupture or calf rupture. Come to find out I sustained a stage 2 calf strain. The strength in my right calf is gone, I am having a hard time even doing seated calf raises. To say the least this sidelines my training. From what I was told and what I have read it is 6-8 weeks before I can think about training at the level I was. So what does that mean. Where do I sit on my journey?
I would love to say that I took this injury in stride and didn't let it effect me or my attitude. Well that is not true, I failed miserably! By Friday evening I let depression set in and I turned to food with the justification that I was injured and my training was derailed. My diet went to crap over the weekend. I sat in my chair all weekend, ate like crap, and felt sorry for myself. I let all sorts of dark thoughts enter my head. I basically failed myself and everything that I have worked for.
Now what do I do? How do I step out of this funk? I wish I had the answers, but right now I don't. We will have to see what tomorrow brings.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

1 comment:

  1. Derailings happen. Binges happen. You just have to have the courage to get back on track at a slower pace. Which I know you can and I'm sure your wife in kiddos would agree. Keep it up. =)

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